___bahh
It hurts to be criticised. Especially for something that is supposedly my forte. And now, all of a sudden, people say that I'm not right to play the way I'm playing. Isn't it a matter of style? Which means everyone has the right to experiment on their own way of playing? Oh well, just take it that the whole thing is my fault. It really is anyway. It's my fault for not being open enough to criticisms, for dwelling too much on the importance of parts, for being too biased againt people, for complaining too much. Yeah, I know I'm in the wrong. SIGH. I don't know what else to say. Just perhaps wanting to ask you to put yourself into people's shoes at times, and yet not wanting to face up to your defensive stance.
Ahh I'm so damn tired. Yet still so happy to be able to work for the band. I finally know what the feeling of doing behind-the-scenes work is like. It's very tiring yet rather fulfilling after all. Blue, blue and more blue cloth. Efficient maid! Three of us not being able to cut in a straight line. Tying and tying and taking photos! Staying up till so late. Joanne auntiess, there's more to come for us!
Countdown to Etude: 2 days. Perhaps I've learnt to accept whatever comes my way, or maybe I'm just resigned to it. I shall tell myself that it doesn't matter what I play, that section matters should be left aside. The most important thing is the company of the band people, to be able to play as one with the band. And it's SO TRUE. I simply love this band, and I'm really grateful for all the joys that band has brought me.
timecheck: 8:45 AM
